Success
I recently became aware of someone who's feelings seem to be dreadfully hurt by the success of an enterprise. The reason? Having been a former director possibly?
I got to thinking about this situation because, as I noted in my last post, I have recently changed jobs, including companies. Until now, I have been happy to report that my successors have not lived up to my reputation. This is always a wonderful feeling, no matter who you are. Just knowing that you are irreplaceable makes you also feel somewhat immortal. You will be remembered for what you can accomplish. You end up occasionally being more impressive in your own absence than you were had you stuck around.
At my last place of employment, for example, management is in the process of completely re-vamping the hierarchy of power. I personally had suggested this happen, and railed against the status quo before leaving. I felt changes were needed in management as well those we managed. I said it to a few people on my way out the door, although I don't know that I was only marginally recognized for having said these things. The real point here, though, is that as part of this process, I am being replaced by between 3 and 4 persons. This gives me somewhat of an inflated ego, and believe me I like to mention this in an effort to ameliorate the pain of leaving my employer of 16 years. Bottom line is that it makes me feel good to know that not only could I not succeed at my job because it was too overwhelming, but that many people agreed and thought that it would be overwhelming not just for me, but for anyone. In the meantime, I can feel like I held things together while I was there, and that no one can accomplish what I couldn't accomplish.
Knowing this is the plan for moving my former office forward, though, doesn't make me feel better about one thing - that they may succeed without me where they were not able to succeed while I was there. Knowing that there is a re-structering happening just makes me wonder if the office will be better now. If it is and I'm not a part of it, does that make me a failure? Should I have tried harder while I was there even if it was draining me heart and soul? Will they talk about how the office could have always been better had I just been better?
These are questions we all grapple with as we move on in life. And the feeling of not being missed, or not being wanted back is a hard one to grapple with as we try to believe that we as individuals are important.
I got to thinking about this situation because, as I noted in my last post, I have recently changed jobs, including companies. Until now, I have been happy to report that my successors have not lived up to my reputation. This is always a wonderful feeling, no matter who you are. Just knowing that you are irreplaceable makes you also feel somewhat immortal. You will be remembered for what you can accomplish. You end up occasionally being more impressive in your own absence than you were had you stuck around.
At my last place of employment, for example, management is in the process of completely re-vamping the hierarchy of power. I personally had suggested this happen, and railed against the status quo before leaving. I felt changes were needed in management as well those we managed. I said it to a few people on my way out the door, although I don't know that I was only marginally recognized for having said these things. The real point here, though, is that as part of this process, I am being replaced by between 3 and 4 persons. This gives me somewhat of an inflated ego, and believe me I like to mention this in an effort to ameliorate the pain of leaving my employer of 16 years. Bottom line is that it makes me feel good to know that not only could I not succeed at my job because it was too overwhelming, but that many people agreed and thought that it would be overwhelming not just for me, but for anyone. In the meantime, I can feel like I held things together while I was there, and that no one can accomplish what I couldn't accomplish.
Knowing this is the plan for moving my former office forward, though, doesn't make me feel better about one thing - that they may succeed without me where they were not able to succeed while I was there. Knowing that there is a re-structering happening just makes me wonder if the office will be better now. If it is and I'm not a part of it, does that make me a failure? Should I have tried harder while I was there even if it was draining me heart and soul? Will they talk about how the office could have always been better had I just been better?
These are questions we all grapple with as we move on in life. And the feeling of not being missed, or not being wanted back is a hard one to grapple with as we try to believe that we as individuals are important.
posted by Barbara | 11:39 PM
2 Comments:
you as an individual ARE important. and your friendship is valued greatly :)
Thank you, dear sir. And I only hope that you know the same of yourself.
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